Unfortunately, I am the type of person to say things first and reflect on them later. Yesterday I said something aloud which shocked me and made me come to the conclusion that I have a parasocial relationship with a celebrity; that is, I am emotionally invested in a pop culture icon who (most likely, unless he's seen my tweets at him), is hitherto unawares of my existence. What I said was so ridiculous that I thought I would share.
On Thursday, MTV aired its "Video Music Awards." Despite the fact that most critics agree the program is a cultural abomination, showcasing the fact that America's youths seem to be growing stupider and more party-obsessed annually, I tuned in, lured by the fact that my precious darling Frank Ocean would be performing and was nominated for Best Video and Best New Artist. Tweeting furiously throughout Lil Wayne's pathetic caterwauling, Pink's undignified crotch shot, and Drake's tearful speech about childhood bullies, I waited for Frank's awards to be rightfully presented to him.
Much to my disappointment in humanity, Frank Ocean lost both awards to boy band One Direction.
I get it. I am twenty one years old watching a program I feel I outgrew at fifteen, expecting an artist who actually wrote, composed, and produced all his own songs to win against these adorable tweens. The camera panned to Frank Ocean and I saw that he looked pretty unsurprised by the news.
Cue me, yesterday. My roommate asked me how the awards turned out, because, sadly, she knew how excited I was to watch them. I told her this" "Frank Ocean lost to One Direction in both categories. He wasn't surprised. He knew it was a stupid awards show. I saw it on his face. We both knew it."
I am still stunned that I said such a thing.
This incident leads me to question what role these parasocial relationships have in our lives. I definitely know that my consideration of a person who is totally unavailable to me is coming at somewhat of a social cost. How would we be as people if a celebrity culture did not exist? Maybe my life would be much simpler. I am not qualified to go into the psychology of the matter, but I am interested in the implications of a fictional world created by a person obsessed with a public figure.
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